Finding YOUR Flow - Getting Out of Creative Droughts

It’s been around 6 weeks since I’ve written anything. And the last post I wrote was about how I wasn’t going to give up on this blog even though a lot of my motivation and inspiration had died down. And since that post, where I said with such conviction that I was not going to stop, I’ve been dealing with the shame and guilt of doing the complete opposite. And those feelings of guilt, unworthiness, and self-doubt only made it harder and harder for me to find the internal space to produce anything.

As such, I went into a very familiar kind of depression - the kind where any idea or inspiration I had was laced with a hint of guilt and hopelessness. The words “What’s the point?” became my internal, involuntary mantra whenever I would think about making something. Even when I mustered up the focus to complete something, I could barely enjoy it because in the back of my head I wasn’t doing what I was “supposed” to be doing - writing for this blog.

Anyway, here I am…finally…writing.

So what idea was so grand and enthralling that I got pulled out of my depression to sit here and write again?

Well…that.

That whole experience and process that I went through (am going through) is what I am writing about.

In this post I want to share the idea of self-acceptance and what following a passion can look like, and some tips for getting over dry spells.

Just “go with the flow”

This phrase is often thrown around when it comes to doing something creative. And I do agree that going with the flow is generally a good approach to life, but going “with the flow” doesn’t mean your creative process will feel smooth, simple, and efficient all the time. That’s because creativity doesn’t always flow like a bounding river. Sometimes that river dries up and you have to just trust that the morning dew is enough moisture to keep those creative gears lubricated and moving (my gears are obviously a bit rusty because these metaphors are all over the place). But see, despite my sloppy use of metaphors, I am still writing. And that’s kind of the point. Going with the flow means you stop overthinking every move/action/idea you have, and you accept yourself and life for what it is in that moment.

For example, during my writing drought, I was still actually quite creatively inspired, just not in the area of writing. Instead, I managed to finish the paintings for my oracle deck, digitize, edit, and format them for printing, and start the GoFundMe so I can eventually publish them. I also started exploring using different painting/drawing mediums on larger format. And as usual, I snuck in a few days of jewelry making.

But for some reason, despite how much I was able to create, I still didn’t feel like I was doing enough or doing the “right” things because I wasn’t writing for the blog. And that belief - that I was wasting my time - was the only reason it felt like I wasn’t in a state of flow. It was only my conscious mind that made me question my actions. But if I didn’t have the preconception about what I was supposed to do, I would have realized that I never came out of my flow.

Therefore, if you feel like you’re having a hard time “going with the flow”, it would be worthwhile to question what beliefs or constructs are convincing you that you are not in a flow. Do you think you’re out of the flow just because you need to rest for a few days or weeks? Or maybe you think you’re blocked because you can’t write about a particular topic, yet you have a million other ideas vying for your attention. Or maybe you can’t bring yourself to work on a project so you’ve been going to the gym or socializing instead. Well, if you change your perspective, all of those actions (or non-actions) can be a part of being in flow (not the psychological state of flow that was coined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, but more of the Taoist concept of flow).

It is only our beliefs and judgments that stop us from feeling in flow with our lives and our decisions. If you manage to see every choice you make as equally important and valid, and you are in alignment with yourself and not judging yourself, then you will feel your life flowing.

And maybe you don’t have an issue with staying “on task”, but you haven’t been able to create something that you’re happy with or proud of. Well, that also comes down to judgements and beliefs you have about what is “good” or “bad”. Maybe you believe that everything you produce needs to meet a certain standard, otherwise it’s not a success or worth sharing (this is also why I haven’t bothered writing…I didn’t feel like I could produce something I would be proud of. Even now as I write this post I have to ignore all of the limiting, negative thoughts coming up that are telling me this isn’t good enough and that I should probably give up.). But where did those standards come from? And why do we let that dictate how we feel about ourselves and our work?

My flow is square

Up until very recently, I struggled a lot to appreciate my drawings and paintings because I lacked/lack a “style”. I also had so much trouble just “letting go” when it came to putting paint to paper, which made me think I was a sub-par artist.

I guess at some point in my life I adopted the belief that true artists are people like Jackson Pollock or Basquiat - people that push boundaries and make art to match their devastating inner and outer anguish. I refused to call myself an artist because despite how much I would draw, paint, and make things, I never felt like I had that passionate desperation to say something through my art.

For as long as I could remember I was the person that drew inside the lines, wanted everything to be even and clean, and could not pull any particular image from my imagination (most of my art was either completely abstract or was drawn from life). My paintings never had “meaning”.

It took me about 30 years to finally realize that I am not those other artists. And that I don’t have a particular style. And that my favorite kind of art is the kind where my brain doesn’t have to be involved at all in understanding what it’s about. I like when my eyes can just look at a piece and my body and subconscious just absorb it in its totality (the first time I saw a Kandinsky “composition” it felt like my soul was consuming the most satisfying treat that I couldn’t get enough of).

So what I enjoy making the most is just putting simple lines, shapes, and colors together in a way that feels satisfying to me (I finally realize that I am much more of a designer than a painter/artist, and that’s why I am pulled more towards crafts or designing usable objects).

(Side note, it’s funny that hardly any of the art I have in my shop represents what I just wrote about. They are all images with a lot of meaning/concepts. And I guess that’s because I curated my shop to offer things I feel like more people can relate to. Most people want their art to mean something - to remind them of a message or memory. People enjoy images and having subjects to focus on. I guess my next step in self acceptance is to create and put up art that is more authentically me, which would include more crafts/utilitarian objects because my favorite designs are the kind that can be worn and used for something. But that’s a whole other subject.)

My point is, by trying to be more “flowy” with my art, I was actually working against myself and stopping my flow, which happens to be more rigid and predictable/safe in comparison to Pollock. But now that I have accepted what my flow looks like, I can stop getting in the way of it.

That being said, we are always changing and evolving who we are (hopefully), and so it’s also okay if/when you find that your flow completely changes its way of being. I might wake up one day and find that I no longer resonate with the colors, designs, techniques, or materials I’m usually drawn to. And then I will have to use the same self-awareness to accept my new artistic flow without judgment.

Rehydrating your flow

Okay, so besides figuring out what limiting beliefs your mind uses to self-sabotage your creative flow, it is also helpful to have a few tools in your back pocket to snap yourself out of a dry spell.

The first one being, take a step back.

If something isn’t moving, stop pushing into it. Step away from it for as long as it takes to become detached from it completely - until all inner dialogue and anxieties about it stop taking up your energy. When you can re-approach it as if you’re seeing it for the first time, and you have no intention for what it should be, then it is okay to continue working on it.

And there is no set amount of time that this can take. It really depends on how quickly you’re able to mentally detach from it. You can try things like physically resting and relaxing, enjoying a bath and a good meal, meeting with friends, going for a walk, or watching some trashy reality TV. The important thing is that you do something that re-ignites your fire and brings you back into a joyful vibration (or “sparks joy” as Marie Kondo would say).

You will see that as soon as you’re back in alignment and you have a smile on your face, you will jump back into the saddle with guns a’blazing. And when you come back to whatever you stepped away from, you’ll either approach it without even having to think about it, or you’ll realize you couldn’t make progress with it because you were not resonating with it to begin with. You might decide to trash the idea all together, or to make a sharp turn in a different direction.

All resistance tells us when we are out of alignment with ourselves.

The other tip I would give for getting back into flow, is finding creative exercises to do either within your medium or in something completely different.

If you’re a visual artist, try doing something with dance or music. If you’re a musician, try cooking or sports. If you’re a writer, draw a picture or meet new people. Obviously these combinations are kind of arbitrary, but the point is to do something that doesn’t make you think about your specific medium, but it still makes you use the creative part of your brain.

And if you can’t access a different medium, then do a small, unrelated exercise within your medium. If you’re struggling with a painting, make a doodle from a prompt. If you’re a musician that can’t finish mixing a song, go jam or learn a new skill on your instrument. If you’re writing a book, try writing a poem or a short story within a different genre/topic. Just pick something that is doable within a short amount of time, and something that makes you shift gears completely from what you’re working on.

Finally, you can also take a more spiritual/intuitive approach to finding answers.

Try visualization/meditation exercises to seek the solution within yourself.

Sit or lie down in a space where you won’t be distracted or bothered, and then mentally (in your “mind’s eye”) place the issue/topic/project you’re working on in front of you. Look at it, and then start to just allow the next steps to unfold and reveal themselves to you. The hardest part of this approach is to not let your conscious/reasoning mind try to come up with a solution, but to let other forms of consciousness come through (read my article on Creativity and Channeling to get a better sense of what I’m talking about).

When you sit in this mentally open space, you might start to receive intuitive guidance in the form of random words/thoughts, memories, visions, song lyrics, or people that you know. When something comes up, follow it down the rabbit hole and see where it leads you.

Maybe you’re working on a song, but you’re not happy with the instrumentals…something is missing. Then, during your meditation, you see yourself enjoying an orange. It’s very random, but you start to wonder and have a train of thought…

“Why would I see myself eating an orange? When was the last time I ate an orange? Oh yeah, I had one the other day with my friend. They cut it up really strangely…I wonder who taught them to cut an orange like that. Wait…who taught me how to cut an orange? Oh yeah, my grandmother did that one summer I visited her. Man, that was such a good trip. That place had that beautiful lake. That’s where I met my friend Sam. When was the last time I talked to Sam? I wonder how he’s doing…I should text him.” So you text Sam, and after a bunch of catching up you find out that he’s been playing the cello for the last 5 years and would love to add a cello track to your song. Et voila…there is your answer.

Or maybe by seeing yourself eat an orange you decide to get up and go eat an orange, and that’s when the answer comes to you. Obviously there are infinite ways your intuition can reach out to you for you to arrive at a solution, but the point is that you sit and give your intuition the time and space (mentally) to speak to you. And that you don’t block or doubt the messages trying to come in. For example, if all you saw was yourself eating an orange, you could easily dismiss it and conclude that the meditation was not successful. That would be your reasoning mind blocking a message. Try not to let your ego make you feel ridiculous or insecure about following an intuitive idea.

Everything has a flow

I just want to make a final point that everything I mentioned above applies to non-art forms of creativity as well. Even if you think there is nothing creative about what you’re working on, there probably is. You can find creative ways to approach a business issue, a relationship issue, or how to get more plants to fit into your apartment.

I would even say that if you’re trying to solve any kind of problem, you can benefit from utilizing creativity. Because any time we are dealing with the unknown, we are dealing with the infinite. And as long as we don’t let our limited 3rd dimensional brains take the lead, then there are infinite solutions we can tap into.

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Just to summarize what I feel like might have been a bit of a jumbled message, to be in flow is to fully accept yourself and your decisions, and to not judge yourself when you need to rest, take a step back, dabble in something else, or start something from zero. It means loving and appreciating whatever you are able to produce or be at any given moment.

In order to do this we have to identify and clear out any beliefs that make us feel like we are not enough. Once we get rid of all the shame, self-doubt, insecurities, and anxieties that stop us from seeing our infinite creative potential and power, then we can stop feeling the need to steer ourselves against the current or make our flow look like anyone else’s.

Without the pressure to perform for (or like) anyone else, your creative flow can feel like the most enjoyable lazy river ride you’ve ever been on made just for you.